Cast: Aleece Jones, John Michael Herndon, Christopher Ivins
Cinematography: Will Turner
The basic plot is a small town girl who wants to be an artist. She knows that if she can escape the small town life she will make it. She knows this. Her only source of inspiration is an unfinished mural that may be gone if the abandoned factory it adorns is destroyed.
Now, she has to ask herself; What is important?
The Again deals with a lot of themes that are revisited time and again in film. This can lead to cliches and tired old film making at its worst. But they don't have actress Aleece Jones. She breathes such life in to this part that you wish there was more movie.
You see, I get it. Small town artist. Fighting for things you know are right and it doesn't matter. I get what this is about having been there so many times myself in real life.
Then Again struck a chord with me that I know it will strike with others like me. Hell, maybe even people who aren't like me at all.
In the new issue of GQ Magazine there is an article called The Least Influential People of 2012 written by Drew Magary.
Drew Magary, for wont of a better word, is an idiot.
Here is why.
In the list he has, at number sixteen, Whoever Directed John Carter. Why not just give his name? Andrew Stanton. Pretty easy to look up. IMDB for all it's faults does tend to get big budget movie information correct on a semi regular basis. But, that isn't the problem.
I now quote the article;
"Next time you waste 250 million shooting and reshooting a terrible movie based on obscure source material, ask around first."
OBSCURE SOURCE MATERIAL?!?!?!?!?!
Edgar Rice Burroughs seminal science fiction novel that influenced writers, film makers, scientists for decades and some hack in a men's magazine refers to it as obscure source material???
Um, what?
This is unacceptable. I will be posting the link from this article to Facebook, Twitter and whatever else I can find to shout it from the rooftops. We as true fans of actual literature need an apology for this.
No excuses.
Indian dude with a tiger on a boat. I think this movie is going to look better that the story line will come across. I'll still probably watch it. My daughter likes tigers.
RED DAWN
Urgh! I hate remakes! But it has the kid from Drake and Josh (Josh, not Drake) and Thor is in it and The Comedian. I really do not like remakes but I might have to make an exception.
RISE OF THE GUARDIANS
This looked like animated fun to me. Theater worthy? Nope, but I'll see it eventually.
HITCHCOCK
Anthony Hopkins as Alfred Hitchcock. This has the possibility of being either really great or stupid as paint. (NOTE: While looking for the poster I discovered that Scarlett Johannsen is in it. Yeah, I'll watch the damned thing now.)
THE TWILIGHT SAGA: BLAH! BLAH! PART WHATEVER
Yeah, gonna have to tear myself away from this puppy.
LINCOLN
When is Spielberg going to make good movies again?
SKYFALL
I heard this was good. I have yet to see Daniel Craig in this role. This might be the one.
WRECK IT RALPH
Seems like silly fun and videogames. It will probably do better than SCOTT PILGRIM VS. THE WORLD
FLIGHT
When will Robert Zemeckis make good movies again?
ARGO
Not theater worthy, but it looks good and I will watch it. Probably when it hits Netflix.
There ya go folks, another batch of flicks hitting the holiday theaters. Enjoy at your risk!
The Warner Archive Collection (WAC) – the Warner Bros. Digital Distribution (WBDD) division dedicated to releasing on DVD previously unavailable films and television shows – today announced the launch of its first Blu-ray™ titles. The two titles, Deathtrapand Gypsy, will debut on November 20. Beginning in February 2013, WAC expects to release a minimum of one to two Blu-ray titles per month. Future titles include The Hudsucker Proxy and Fearless.
WAC reports that the Blu-ray discs will be replicated in limited quantities and fulfilled on demand. All releases will leverage high quality 1080p masters. In many instances, as with Deathtrap, the films will be available for the first time for home viewing in their original widescreen format.
Starting as a modest initiative, WAC has quickly grown to become a new business model for the studio and a recognized industry leader. Since launching in March 2009, WAC has released more than 1,500 films, short subjects, TV movies and mini-series that otherwise would not have been available, providing a valuable service to film lovers everywhere.
Now, WAC’s entry into the Blu-ray market is the latest example of its fast growth and increasing popularity with consumers who have embraced the technology as the standard for the highest quality home movie viewing on disc. This year, domestic sales of catalog titles on Blu-ray grew 22% in the third quarter from a year earlier. In fact, Blu-ray sales have shown impressive gains every quarter in 2012, continuing the trend set in 2011 over 2010 when sales were up 20%.[1]
In making the Blu-ray announcement, WBDD President Thomas Gewecke said, “This is an important innovation that fulfills consumer demand for high definition releases that otherwise would not be available in physical formats. We’re excited to have the opportunity to further expand the Warner Archive Collection into the Blu-ray marketplace with an impressive slate of releases.”
Warner Archive Collection titles can be purchased through their web site (www.warnerarchive.com) for $21.99 SRP or through other leading online retailers.
I was made aware of this web series and decided to check it out. I like the concept of an alien turning himself in to the authorities and telling his life story. They get to do different time periods and show what the alien has been through enduring life on our planet for thousands of years. Well written, funny and a little sad, this is something that fans of stuff like Doctor Who and Firefly would get behind.
Being a huge Low Budget Pictures fan when I saw this plea for fundage for a new TeenApe flick I had to share it amongst my brethren. Here is the video;
CONCEALED is a cool idea, let me use their synopsis to bring you up to speed;
Concealed 360 is an interactive film which uses 360-degree audio and
visual exploration to explore how one’s personal perspective affects
their interpretation of narrative. Concealed 360 is about Dillon Wagner,
an amateur drug trafficker, who emerges from a coma and tries to figure
out how he ended up in a hospital. In addition to his memory loss, he
finds out that his closest friend and drug connection, Joey Valeri, was
murdered. Not knowing why, or by whom, Wagner desperately tries to piece
together the last few days leading up to the murder. Filmed with a
360-degree camera-rig consisting of six 1080p cameras, the film will
enable users to pan 360-degrees, while taking in the action of each
scene as it unfolds in order to solve the murder mystery.
I can remember going to Disney World when I was a kid and they had this cool exhibit where you stood in a room and there was a screen alll the way around the room. They shot tours of famous places in this process and it felt like you were there, drawing you into the event. Very cool.
Concealed does the same, but with a narrative storyline instead of a documentary style of film. I think that it might not work as well because each individual has different life experiences that would color their perception of what they are seeing. But, it is a great attempt at bringing something new to film. I would love to see a huge, big budget action movie shot like this. It would be phenomenal!
Zedic and the Crimson Born deals with a young man coming to grips with odd phenomena occurring around him. Weird noises and halos of light. Then he comes face to face with Zedic, part of an alien race that has visitied Earth to help us and is here to help us again.
This is an interesting process and the short film does have some cool special effects, but it is marred by horrible, stilted acting and a non ending that lends itself to confusion more than anything. Like I said, the concept works, but the execution is dreadful.
Need a really long list of stuff to watch on demand in October? Yeah, I thought you might. Here you go!
10/2
Dark
Shadows
(WB) – (PG-13)
After being turned into a
vampire by a jilted lover, Barnabas (Johnny Depp) is entombed for two
centuries until he emerges into the very changed world of 1972.
Starring: Johnny Depp, Michelle
Pfeiffer, Helena Bonham Carter, Eva Green, Chloe Grace Moretz, Jackie
Earle Haley
People
Like Us
(Buena Vista) – (PG-13)
An inspirational movie everyone
can relate to. Sam, a twenty-something, fast-talking salesman uncovers a
startling secret that turns his entire world upside down.
Starring: Chris Pine, Elizabeth
Banks, Olivia Wilde, Jon Favreau, Michelle Pfieffer
10/5
#HoldYourBreath (WB) –
(TV-MA)
A group of friends on a weekend
camping trip find themselves being picked off one by one when one member
of the group refuses to abide by the urban myth that you can breathe in
evil spirits when passing cemeteries.
Starring: Katrina Bowden, Randy
Wayne
[Available the
Same Day As the Theatrical Release]
10/9
Rock
of Ages
(WB) – (PG-13)
In 1987 Los Angeles, a rock
star and a Hollywood rock club facing its final countdown converge with an
aspiring musician and a small town girl with big dreams.
Starring: Julianne Hough, Diego
Boneta, Russell Brand, Paul Giamatti, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Malin Akerman,
Mary J. Blige, Bryan Cranston, Alec Baldwin, Tom Cruise
The
Raven
(Relativity) – (R)
A brutal killing spree
terrorizes 19th-century Baltimore and a young detective turns to notorious
author Edgar Allan Poe for help getting inside the mind of a serial
killer.
Starring: John Cusack, Luke
Evans, Alice Eve, Brendan Gleeson, Kevin McNally
10/11
Prometheus (Fox) – (R)
Prometheus is a groundbreaking
mythology, in which a team of explorers discover a clue to the origins of
mankind on Earth, leading them on a thrilling journey to the darkest
corners of the universe.
Starring: Noomi Rapace, Michael
Fassbender, Charlize Theron, Idris Elba, Guy Pearce, Logan Marshall-Green
10/12
2016:
Obama’s America
(Lionsgate) – (PG)
Just in time for this
year's Presidential election, don't miss the must-see
documentary that has the entire country talking.
Excuse
Me for Living
(WB) – (TV-MA)
A brilliant, yet suicidal
druggie must obey his rehab-clinic's demand to lead a seniors men's group
or face incarceration and lose the love of a girl.
Starring: Tom Pelphrey,
Christopher Lloyd, Robert Vaughn, Dick Cavett, Wayne Knight, Jerry Stiller
[Available the
Same Day As the Theatrical Release]
10/16
Chernobyl
Diaries
(WB) – (R)
Six tourists hire a guide to
take them through the abandoned former home of the Chernobyl nuclear
reactor. During their exploration, they soon discover they are not alone.
Starring: Devin Kelley,
Jonathan Sadowski, Ingrid Bolsø Berdal, Olivia Taylor Dudley, Jesse
Mccartney, Nathan Philips, Dimitri Diatchenko
Moonrise
Kingdom
(Universal) – (PG-13)
Set on an island near New
England in the summer of 1965, two twelve-year-olds fall in love, make a
secret pact, and run away together into the wilderness.
Starring: Bruce Willis, Edward
Norton, Bill Murray, Frances McDormand, Tilda Swinton, Jason Schwartzman
That’s
My Boy
(Sony) – (R)
While in his teens, Donny
fathered a son, Todd, and raised him as a single parent up until Todd's 18th
birthday. Now, after not seeing each other for years, Todd's world comes
crashing down when Donny resurfaces just before Todd's wedding.
Starring: Adam Sandler, Andy
Samberg, Leighton Meester
Madagascar
3: Europe’s Most Wanted (Paramount) – (PG)
Alex, Marty, Gloria and Melman
are still fighting to get home to their beloved Big Apple. Their journey
takes them through Europe where they find the perfect cover: a traveling
circus, which they reinvent - Madagascar style.
Voices: Ben Stiller, Chris
Rock, David Schwimmer, Jada Pinkett Smith, Sacha Baron Cohen, Cedric the
Entertainer
10/23
Abraham
Lincoln: Vampire Hunter (Fox) – (R)
Abraham Lincoln, the 16th
President of the United States, discovers vampires are planning to take
over the United States. He makes it his mission to eliminate them.
Starring: Benjamin Walker,
Dominic Cooper, Anthony Mackie, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Rufus Sewell,
Marton Csokas
Seeking
a Friend for the End of the World (Universal) – (R)
As an asteroid nears Earth, a
man finds himself alone after his wife leaves in a panic. He decides to
take a road trip to reunite with his high school sweetheart. Accompanying
him is a neighbor who inadvertently puts a wrench in his plan.
Starring: Steve Carell, Keira
Knightly, Connie Britton, Patton Oswalt, Rob Corddry, William Peterson,
Melanie Lynskey, Adam Brody, Gillian Jacobs, Derek Luke
A Wall Street investment banker
who has been set up as the linchpin of his company's mob-backed Ponzi
scheme is relocated with his family to Aunt Madea's southern home.
Starring: Tyler Perry, Eugene
Levy, Denise Richards, Doris Roberts, Tom Arnold, Romeo Miller, John Amos,
Marla Gibbs
Magic
Mike
(WB) – (R)
A male stripper teaches a
younger performer how to party, pick up women, and make easy money.
Starring: Channing Tatum, Alex
Pettyfer, Matthew McConaughey, Matt Bomer, Joe Manganiello, Olivia Munn,
Cody Horn, Riley Keough
10/30
The
Campaign
(WB) – (R)
In order to gain influence over
their North Carolina district, two CEOs seize an opportunity to oust
long-term congressman Cam Brady by putting up a rival candidate. Their
man: naive Marty Huggins, director of the local Tourism Center.
Starring: Will Ferrell, Zach
Galifianakis, Jason Sudeikis, Dan Akroyd, Dylan McDermott, John Lithgow
Ruby
Sparks
(Fox) – (R)
A novelist struggling with
writer's block finds romance in a most unusual way: by creating a female
character he thinks will love him, then willing her into existence.
Starring: Paul Dano, Zoe Kazan,
Antonio Banderas, Annette Bening, Steve Coogan, Elliott Gould, Chris
Messina
Safety
Not Guaranteed
(Sony) – (R)
Three magazine employees head
out on an assignment to interview a guy who placed a classified ad seeking
a companion for time travel.
So the kids from 3rd Rock From The Sun kills people sent back from the future. He works for the mob who control time travel. Now they sent him back as old and busted Bruce Willis. Sounds like a Philip K. Dick novel to me. I'll wait for Netflix for this one.
HOTEL TRANSYLVANIA
I am a big fan of the old Rankin/Bass MAD MONSTER PARTY. This just looks like a fun update on the whole thing. The kid in me says to go watch it. Luckily, the old man who has to trudge to the theater agrees.
WON'T BACK DOWN
I'll see this in a couple of years when it's a repeat on cable or something. Alright, I'm lying. The only way I'm seeing this is if I'm lying in a hospital bed, unable to move and the damned nurse switches this thing on. I'm hoping for scanner powers at that point so I can blow up the TV and set the nurse on fire.
PITCH PERFECT
The trailer for this made me laugh. Theater worthy? No. But I will watch it.
Kind of a short week, but we do have other stuff coming down the pike. I do like the plethora of shitty horror movies I keep seeing trailers for. There's the one with guy who was on that show where she was the ditzy redhead and he was the gay guy. I forget the name of it. And another one with Ethan Hawke and haunted film, a concept used by Seduction Cinema more than once. I'm betting his movie has a lot less lesbians in it, though.
I first met Henrique Couto at Cinema Wasteland. He was the
madman with the electric ukulele. I then noticed him in some Low Budget Pictures
by Chris Seaver. Then came Face of Schlock and Marty Jenkins and the Vampire Bitches.
Henrique Couto is a talented young man who I am happy to call my friend.
Recently, I was invited to Englewood Cinema in Dayton, Ohio
to watch his horror film, Bleeding Through. You can check the review of that
film here.
At that premiere he invited all of us to come back for his
next film, Depression: The Movie.
Depression deal with four stories of people who deal with
their depression in different ways. It also shows them coming to face with
everything from issues with an estranged father to never finding your true
love.
The cool thing is that it does it in the form of a comedy.
From hilarious sight gags to some of the best dialogue I have heard this year,
the four people who make up this film know that they are depressed and still
manage to soldier on.
Mr. Couto put a lot of himself up on the screen that night
in Englewood
and that is what works so well. I was proud of him doing a little old fashioned
ballyhoo with prescription bottles full of candy with the title of the movie on
the label to an inspired sing along where we actually got to follow the bouncing
ball. He made it more than a movie, he made it an experience to remember for a
lifetime.
I know an eight hour round trip is a heck of a journey to
see a film, but when it comes from Henrique Couto it is more than worth the
price.
I had fun with this last week so, here we go again.
DREDD 3D
I hate that they are forcing 3D on people for this. Judge Dredd is one of my favorite comic series. I read that stuff for years. I was so sad when Sylvester Stallone ruined it for so many people. The new stuff looks great in the trailer so, I will try to find a 2D alternative and that will mak eme happy.
END OF WATCH
I have never liked Jake Gylenhall (Did I spell that right? Who cares?) I do like the guy who was in Observe and Report as the security guard who was the mall thief, but this doesn't look all that funny. The camera work gives me a headache.
THE HOUSE AT THE END OF THE STREET
The cute girl who played Mystique in X MEN: FIRST CLASS is in it with a white tank top and jeans for what appears to be the entirety of the flick. She is pretty cute so I might give this a shot when Netflix gets it. It has inspired me to write a horror spoof script called SECOND HOUSE IN THE CUL DE SAC. Makes me laugh to type it.
TROUBLE WITH THE CURVE
Clint Eastwood playing a grumpy old man??? Never seen that before.
THE PERKS OF BEING A WALLFLOWER
Here is your quirky Rom-Com for the month people. Get on board if you like that sort of thing.
Man, I can't believe they let them make this one. Was it for Shark Week last year? Who knows? So, we get the rich girl who invites her friends to her parents' island estate down in the bayou for a little fun and sun.
Then the sharks show up and bite the token black guys' arm off. When they try to get him to the hospital the shark bumps the boat and eats his girlfriend.
Did they really kill the black couple first? Isn't that considered bad form or cliche' or something like that?
Then the locals show up to help and the girl from American Idol and the guy who falls for the ugly, Russian girl in Dodgeball hitch a ride with them back to the mainland.
Too bad the locals are the ones that have been stirring up the sharks.
Ooooo! Was that a spoiler? Who cares?!?
Seems that these locals have caught all the sharks to get kill videos to sell to the sickos of the world. The rich girl coming home after three years is just icing on the cake.
I actually picked who was going to live at the beginning of this mess and hit it on the head. Hell, they were even smart enough to not kill the dog.
Even 3D wouldn't have saved this thing.
SNOWBEAST
Bo Duke turns in his General Lee to study the mating patterns of Lynx. He heads on up to Canada with two of his Lynx studying cohorts and his daughter because she got expelled from school.
Only problem is there are no lynx. No rabbits and the people population is dwindling as well.
Seems they have a Yeti problem. Or at least something that looks like a Yeti.
I thought that one of the rangers was the guy who played the boyfriend in Kevin Smith's Mallrats. I had no idea he had a twin brother that made these crapfests.
Don't get me wrong, I loves me the bigfoot/yeti genre. This one was pretty cool. Kept the cast to a minimum and gave us a really cool monster suit. None of that CGI crap.
I'll always take a thin plot with a monster suit over anything else. Like that Bigfoot thing I covered earlier with Danny Partridge and Greg Brady.
Good stuff.
I do these once in a while. I look at the releases and rant or rave without having seen a frame, Well, I catch a trailer here and there so I've seen some frames, just not all frames.
Anyway...
THE MASTER
I thought River Phoenix's homely brother was a rap star or something now?? Now he's doing a thinly veiled Scientology movie?!? Yeah, this sounds like a real winner (Insert sarcasm at your leisure.)
RESIDENT EVIL: RETRIBUTION
I don;t care what anyone says. Milla Jovovich has still got it and I'm still gonna watch them. All of them. If you think this is the last one you're pretty damned stupid.
LIBERAL ARTS
The guy who places Ted in How I Met Your Mother is in a movie? And he plays a dude falling for a college student? Didn't he do this like six times in the TV series? And is he unaware that he is the most annoying person on that damned show? Yeah, gonna take a big old pass on this one, Ted.
ARBITRAGE
Richard Gere movie. PASS!
10 YEARS
That guy from the shitty GI JOE movie is is what appears to be some kind of rom-com I have seen zero trailers for. Glad the studios feel the need to push this baby on us.
STOLEN
Nicholas Cage in an action movie on the hunt for his daughter. Okay, he's done this before with good results and we might get another chance to see Malin Akerman's boobies. I can wait for Netflix for that one. Shouldn't be more than a week, two tops.
I am doing this long piece on Antoinette Maynard. I am able to find some of her films, but others elude me. Here is the list of one's that I am unable to find;
INSIDE PUSSYCAT (1979)
HOW SWEET IT IS! (1978) (Not the Debbie Reynolds movie)
WHAT'S BEHIND THE GROUPIES? (1975)
MARRIAGE AND OTHER FOUR LETTER WORDS (1974)
DIAMOND SEXCAPADES (1974)
LIZ:MOMMA'S LITTLE GIRL (1973)
HETEREOSEXUALIS (1973)
THE WINNING STROKE (1973)
AWOL (1973)
MORE THAN FRIENDS (1973)
MY SECRETARY, I LOVE ... (1973)
APARTMENT GIRLS (1972)
AVALON CALLING (1972)
SEX CONTEST (1972)
THE LANDLORD (1972) (Not 1970 or 2009)
THE LIBERTY BELLES (1972)
SIX WOMEN (1971)
THE AFFAIRS OF APHRODITE (1970)
PRECIOUS JEWELS (1969)
I AM FURIOUS (1969)
THE ECSTASIES OF WOMEN (1969)
SCYLA (1967)
And, most important of all;
THE KILL (1968) And not BLOOD HUNGER or RESERVOIR CATS. THE KILL.
Anyone out there who thinks they have any information about any of these, please contact me via this blog.
I was flipping through my Netflix streaming and saw this poster and thought it was Alyssa Milano. It's actually, Erica Cox, but then when I saw Jason Mewes name, I knew I had to watch it.
Mewes plays, Jack, a paramedic working the night shift with his older partner, Roger (Richard Fitzpatrick), loses his girlfriend of six months to a yoga instructor. One morning on his way home he finds a gorgeous girl (Erica Fox) covered in blood and screaming. He takes her in to his house and cleans her up. She refuses to go to the hospital.
But something is wrong with her.
Yeah, you guessed it, she's a vampire.
And she needs Jack's help if she's going to get a square meal.
Jack lives in a rundown area of town filled with bums and drug dealers, this should be a cake walk.
But, hunger is a funny thing.
BITTEN has Jason Mewes doing his best not to act like Jason Mewes, but there's one problem;
He is Jason Mewes.
He carries that baggage to every film he's in. Sure, he manages to carry his own in this flick and he and Fitzpatrick seem to have some actual chemistry, but it just isn't enough. Add that to the fact that the film is just too damned dark. we get that she's a vampire and needs to keep it cool, but it becomes more of a strain on the eyes than anything else.
One little glitch disturbed me.
Early in the flick Jack forces Danika, yeah that's her name, to put her arm in the sun. It burns and bubbles. No surprise with her being a vampire and all.
Later in the film there is this threesome with them and a hot blonde chick. Following that they are all laying in bed with Danika closest to the window and the director decides he wants this fancy time passes shot where you see the sun move through the room...right over Danika's face! Yeah, seems that should do something, but she sleeps right through it.
In the end, BITTEN is too little, the ending sucks and Erica Cox is freaking gorgeous and stays pretty much unclothed throughout the flick.
The only reason to watch this.
A couple of actioners to make up for missing yesterday.
First up we have FUTURE HUNTERS.
I have friends who really like this flick. I think I might like it more if Robert Patrick wasn't in it. I mean we get Richard Norton and Bruce Le, a tribe of midgets, Mongols, Nazis and Linda Carol before she got rough looking.
But Robert Patrick is so damned annoying.
The plot is that it is the future and The Spear of Destiny can enable someone to go back in time and change history because of some armageddon thingie that happens in 1986. Unfortunately, Richard Norton dies when he gets here so it's up to Linda Carol and Robert Patrick to save the day.
But Robert Patrick is so whiny and constantly gets his butt kicked throughout. He even manages to blow up a helicopter and a plane in short succession.
I did like that there were long stretches of zero dialogue, but, for the most part, I doubt I would ever revisit this flick.
Then comes THE DEADLY AND THE BEAUTIFUL A.K.A. WONDER WOMEN.
This baby knows how to start a flick. Girls, naked, swimming in a pool underwater. Then cool chicks in hot pants, halter tops and kick ass afros show up and take them all out. Soon, the multinational squad of sex boms kidnap people from all over the globe. It seems they work for Dr. Tzu (Nancy Kwan) and she has developed a way to transplant any part of the human body to any other body without rejection. The rich come to her for rejuvenation and with the help of her accountant/business manager Mr. Gregorian (Sid Haig), they make some serious cash.
But then they kidnap a world famous jai alai player for a dying man to put his brain into. Seems the jai alai player has been insured for a cool half a million by Lloyds of London. Then its time to send in ex CIA, insurance adjuster Mike Harber (Ross Hagen) to find the athlete and grab some serious cash.
Throw in a number of shoot outs, fight scenes, a lab where Dr. Tzu keeps her mistakes who, naturally, are released and go on a rampage and an acre of succulent, female flesh parading in front of the camera every two seconds and you have a classic exploitation film that is sure to make everyone happy.
I really liked actress, Maria De Aragon as the doomed love interest and head of Dr. Tzu's hit squad. I decided to check her out online and got a bit of a shock.She did a few flicks, but then she played Greedo in Star Wars!! Good for her. She probably makes a fortune on the convention circuit.
Now watch one of the best trailers for a flick I have seen in a while.
I also managed to squeeze in a viewing of PIECES yesterday, but I'm going to pass on reviewing that one. It's been done to death. Great, fun flick, but enough about that one.
The girl in the horrid fangs is Antoinette Maynard.
First up we have SUCKULA. It deals with a reporter telling us of footage they have of Dracula rampaging through the countryside. When I spotted the reporter I'm saying to myself, 'Isn't that George Buck Flower?' No! No way!
Yeah, it was him. He even plays the female, out in the field reporter, but doesn't shave the mustache. Awesome! The movie is like a poverty row version of THE GROOVE TUBE or KENTUCKY FRIED MOVIE. There are goofy commercials interspersed throughout them tracking down Dracula.I did think it odd that the Dracula scenes were done with silent film title cards. Made it a little surreal.
A quick watch that deserves rediscovery. I watched it for Antoinette Maynard, who I fell for the first time I saw BLOOD HUNGER, which is actually a redubbed version of Gary Graver's THE KILL. Incidentally, if anyone out there knows where I might be able to get a copy of THE KILL or THE AFFAIRS OF APHRODITE, please contact me at this blog.
Oh, and it was weird watching her do hardcore. There was one point where I thought that George was going to partake, but it never happened, Thank God!
I will have to upload a clip of this myself as I can find nothing online. I'll get that done later today.
Next up is the believed, Lee Frost classic THE PICK-UP. This gives us the tale of Frankie and Tony, two bag men making a pick up of cold, hard cash in Las Vegas and getting it to Los Angeles post haste. Then they run across two damsels in distress, Dana and Marcia. After Frankie and Dana get it on in the back seat they decide it's time to hit a little motel for some party fun.
Until Marcia pulls a gun on Tony and ties him up. Frankie follows suit and soon the ladies have stashed the cash and left the men handcuffed in the seedy motel room.
But, Tony is the resourceful type and soon they are free and on the run after the girls. They have to get the money back before the mob decides they have bugged out with a million dollars and put out a hit on them.
It takes no time to catch up to the girls, but they aren't talking.
What do you do to women when your life is on the line?
THE PICK-UP might be considered a roughie for no other reason than they whip and beat the girls, apply nipple electrocution and throw them in a bathtub of scalding water.
But, it's more than that. It comes across as one of those dime store hard crime novels. No one in this flick is a good guy. Tony and Frankie are in this for themselves. Their bosses are the worst kind of humanity. This is actually funny as the Vegas Boss, Charlie, is played by a young David F. Friedman.
In the end there are double crosses, triple crosses and a hail of bullets with bodies flying everywhere.
At a clip of 90 minutes, this flick actually propels itself forward at a manic pace.
Director Frost is in his element like other films of his like THE DEFILERS, DIXIE DYNAMITE and A CLIMAX OF BLUE POWER. During the torture scenes he uses some freeze frames that jar you and put you into the scene better than if he had just filmed it.
This was a good time and a well made film that any fan of the roughies would want to add to their collection.
And, yes, Antoinette Maynard is in it. She is trying to convince Charlie that he needs to put her in his next show. Charlie takes her in the bedroom for an 'audition' and then I was torn between seeing Antoinette ad David F. Friedman in a steamy sex scene. I was also not a fan of her wig. Normally she has long, flowing hair. This put it up and made it short. Not a good look for her.
HEDONISTIC PLEASURES is an extremely bizarre mock documentary on the wild sex life in Hollywood. You get hookers and hippies and acid trips and...well, you get the idea. Directed by Ed DePriest, this is only 55 minutes and he tries to pack in as much female flesh as possible.
The weird part is the boobies.
The first girl has missile shaped ones with the entire end of the titty being nipple. The next girl is a lopsided A cup, more like an A- cup. They finally gave us a nice looking pair and her ass was scary. It was a no win kind of thing. The scene with the hippies smoking grass and swimming seems familiar like it was in another mondo flick, but I can't place it. The scene with the couple tripping on acid had this cool projector that made it look like these bizarre shapes were erupting from her mouth. That was cool.
In the end it's a curiosity and required for any Ed DePriest completists. Not too hard as he only directed four films. Yes, I've seen three of them.
No trailer to be found anywhere, I'm afraid, but there is a poster;
JERSEY SHORE SHARK ATTACK was a little different. I have never seen an episode of Jersey Shore. I know of Snooki and The Situation. In this flick it was Nooki and The Complication. Melissa Molinaro plays Nooki and she's actually much prettier than the real thing.
As for the movie;
The shark effects are horrible. Almost all CGI and bad at that. There is one shot of where they caught one and that shark looked pretty cool. Apparently they are albino bull head sharks that are attracted to sound and since they are drilling to put in supports for a new fancy hotel, here come the sharks!
Paul Sorvino, William Atherton (The jackhole from Ghostbusters and Die Hard) and Tony Sirico (Didn't he make enough cash from The Sopranos??) are slumming it here. Sorvino actually looks embarrassed.
In the end this was funny a few times, gory a few times and I was rooting for the sharks. I can't believe that none of the Jersey Shore doppelgangers got eaten. What a gyp!
Haven't done one of these in a while. Had a busy morning with a job interview. Hope that goes well. Then I decided to get a double dose of crap. My daughter, Dandelion watched the first one with me. Martha listened in and made fun of the second one with me. Ready? Here we go.
CHEERLEADER MASSACRE
From the fabulous Jim Wynorski, we get, well a Jim Wynorski film. You know the one. Bunch of hot girls, a cabin out in the woods, hot tubs with dozens of bottles of chocolate syrup nearby. You know! A Jim Wynorski film!
Anyway, there are a group of cheerleaders that are on their way to a game or something. One of them gets killed before they leave the locker room. They run out of gas because of a busted fuel line and are forced to hike to the aforementioned cabin.
We find out that this killer, Jeremiah McPherson is on the loose and in the area and the body count is rising.
But, something is not right. The MO is off.
Is Jeremiah McPherson their only worry?
CHEERLEADER MASSACRE is a fun throwback to the slasher films of old. Not the good ones, but the low rent type. Think SLUMBER PARTY MASSACRE without the wit and originality and you're on the right track.
It's a Wynorski flick so the amount of boobs are humongous, as a re the actual boobs. The acting is deplorable, but there are lots of boobs. The interesting part of this is half of the female cast manages to keep their tops on. So, how does genius Wynorski deal with this? He has the comic relief, Buzzy, tell a story about three girls running from a killer and winding up at a cabin that has a big bath tub and, conveniently enough, several bottles of chocolate syrup lined up next to it. You can guess what goes on at that point.
For a film of this caliber there are some interesting ideas going on here. It's really the one true twist in the flick so, I won't spoil it here.
We get a few intersting kills, the one where the killer lets the hose run under the feet of a woman trying to turn the power box back on and when she flips the switch gets toasted was the best one. Wynorski manages to blend some high budget stock footage into the film to give it a better feel.
Finally, I have to mention that the power gets knocked out of the cabin early on in the flick. Apparently it is a weird fuse box that lets certain rooms have power while others don't. Just adds to the hilarity of what is CHEERLEADER MASSACRE.
YETI, CURSE OF THE SNOW DEMON
As is the rules with any SyFy film, we get a flashback to the 70's so that we can see the titular beast kill someone. Then we hit the Present Day signage and start the movie! We have a college football team on their way to Tokyo for an exhibition game. This has them flying over the Himalayas. Well, until their idiot pilots crash the plane because they don't know how to fly over the storm.
This leaves us with a handful of college kids, a large piece of the fuselage to use as a set, uh I mean shelter. And the Yeti roaming the countryside looking for food of the college kid variety.
The movie tries to incorporate aspects of a monster flick with the stranded in the mountains how long til we eat our friends genre. The one guy, Ravin, (and with a douche name like that you knew he was a douche before he started acting like a douche) starts screaming for human flesh pretty early on. Reminded me of that South Park episode where they are trapped for a couple of hours in a snowstorm and then they eat Eric Roberts.
The captain of the football team tries to keep the survivors together, but douche bag Ravin is sabotaging him at every corner. Their biggest issue, besides the yeti, is that the tail of the plane is nowhere near the black box/locator device they need so the search party can find them.
The 'search party' being Sheppard (Peter Deluise) and Fury (Ona Grauer) and, because of the weather, are on foot.
Now it's a race against time before the Yeti runs out of dead bodies and starts craving something a little fresher.
YETI, CURSE OF THE SNOW DEMON is not a bad film. It's a SyFy film so it already was brought into the world with a chip on it's shoulder, trying to prove itself. I was impressed that the CGI was at a minimum, used for the plane crash and only when the Yeti ran or jumped. Yes, apparently, Yeti can jump in a way that would put Mario to shame. But, for the rest of the film, it was a guy in a suit. It wasn't a bad suit, but it wasn't a great suit.
No real acting to speak of to get in the way of the action. Jerry Gross' horrid black and white film MANBEAST is still a better Yeti flick, but this one tried to make it different with the plane crash survivors with the haunting possibility of cannibalism.
Best part of the film is two of the football players go in search of the black box. They get cornered by the Yeti and try to squeeze through a crevasse. The little guy makes it (probably their goal kicker, yeah, I know a lot about football), when he tries to help his bulkier buddy all he manages to get is the big guy's arm. Later, when he breaks his leg he uses his buddy's arm as a split. This was so cool! I'm pretty sure I never saw this before ever. A bright ray of sunshine in an otherwise mediocre flick.
