Wednesday, January 9, 2019

OBAMALAND (2017)

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In 2016 Donald Trump was elected president. While having lunch with Mike Pence and Paul Ryan they all 'accidentally' fell to their deaths. Quick to find a replacement, the government pushed through an additional term for Barack Hussein Obama which eventually turned him into President for life.
Flash forward to the year 2040 and Obamaland has become a reality and the planet will never be the same. Obama has become obsessed with his redistribution ray that will use a laser to redistribute the wealth of Obamaland to everyone.
One problem...lasers do not redistribute anything and it has become quite clear that Barack Obama has gone around the bend.
Enter Tinder Tucker who after an aborted gang rape at a Mexican bar has become on of the freedom fighting Trumpublikans who will use the power of the chain restaurant Applecheez to bring down the president and return America to her former greatness.
Sounds ludicrous, doesn't it?
The thing that works for this is that all of the actors sell it by playing it straight. No matter how bizarre the film gets, they give you one hundred percent and that helps propel even the most inane concepts that are introduced in the film.
Think of the old Airplane films with a Troma filter and you have what Obamaland is. People with a thin skin will probably be offended on both sides of the political agenda, but I think that's it's purpose. Behind the broad swipes of political humor we get a deeper message about the corruption of power regardless of even the best of intentions. Everything must have a balance or things will just spiral out of control.
Finally, the sent me a hat just like the one that Obama is wearing on the movie poster.
I'm a sucker for free stuff and this one is going on the shelf...or I'm wearing it to a Trump rally and seeing how long it takes anyone to notice.

Thursday, January 3, 2019

Silent Night Deadly Night 6

I know what you're saying; 'there isn't a part 6, ya stupid fuck.' First off...harsh. Second, yes there is and while it is a fan film it is more entertaining than the last couple of releases that are part of the series. It's chopped into four pieces which I have imbedded below. Yes, it's no budget, yes some of the acting is awful, yes that axe is a piece of painted cardboard, but it works and I had a lot of fun watching this. I hope they make another movie soon.


Enjoy and thanks to Matthew Skelly for showing me this.

Tuesday, January 1, 2019

Hello 2019

I have no evidence that this year will be less of a trash fire than the last one, but there is always hope. Here at Divine Exploitation there will be much writing. Well, not on this actual blog, but there is still the second half of the Monster Killer series to get done and I started a new blog about the last six months left at my current place of employment.
I have also decided on huge amounts of self promotion so I will be posting where you can buy all the stuff I have written. I also need to update the scroll on the right to encompass the newer issues of the print version of this blog. And remember, the print version has things that never appear here.
News on the Polonia Book; Honestly, I just stopped doing the research involved in getting it done. Mark Polonia has been nothing but kind whenever I pester him with questions. I plan on picking it back up after Monster Killer is finished. Probably after I quit my job and have more free time. The same goes for the new edition of the Michael Legge book. Michael made what he is calling his last film so, that will be the definitive version of the book. I plan on a color cover with original artwork for it so, that will be cool.

Let's finish up with some of that shameless self promotion I promised;

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Have an excellent year and stick around. I promise things will be at the very least...interesting?

Thursday, December 6, 2018

HIGH VOLTAGE (2018)

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Written and Directed by Alex Keledjian
Starring Luke Wilson, David Arquette, Allie Gonino & Ryan Donowho

The band Hollow Body started out with a singer too scared to sing. With washed up and over the hill bad boy, JImmy (David Arquette) get them in front of people and use his pull with Rick (Luke Wilson) to get a record deal.  Then she got hit by lightning and everything changed. Now, she has become something more. Something dangerous...and evil.
This is an odd movie. It takes it's time to build up to what changes everything. It takes time to establish its characters so that when the movie shifts into horror territory it has more of an impact than ever. It also takes a look at how much the record business has changed. It's more about You Tube metrics and Instagram followers than talent. But, with the scars of lightning crisscrossing her body Rachel has a talent that, pun intended, is electrifying.
David Arquette does a great job as the washed up rock star you can see his desperation to get back into the lime light no matter what the cost and when a minor attack by Rachel restores his voice he considers her worth every penny. Allie Gonino does a great job at the innocent little girl who becomes a monster born of electricity. When she performs on stage she makes you watch her as she gyrates through every song.
Like I said at the beginning; this is an odd movie, but you know what? The world can use more odd movies. It doesn't try to be like anything else and it's probably one of the most original movies I've seen this year.
High Voltage is an odd little flick and that is a good thing.
A great thing.

 

Monday, October 8, 2018

CINEMA WASTELAND REPORT OCTOBER 2018

This year was the My Bloody Valentine reunion. That was interesting to me because it meant that the director and three actors from Pinball Summer would be there. Time to get my vinyl soundtrack signed. I decided to do that first thing Friday and they were all so happy to see it. Look down at the bottom of the post for the lovely folks that signed my stuff.
We got to see all of our Wasteland family and Martha and I watched a short film blocks that had a couple of stand outs. The Clown Dies @ Midnight was hilarious. James Bell's The Bliss was amazing and I told him I want the soundtrack. He said he was working on it.
Later, Dandelion, Dan and I went to see The Boogens. Everyone was watching the show and making comments, you know, like you do at Wasteland. Anyway this old fart at the end of our aisle leaned over and told us our commentary was ridiculous and to be quiet. I don;t think he saw me as I was sitting between my children. I leaned forward and yelled Calm Down! He went to sit somewhere else and I noticed that people started commenting louder after he opened his yap. We managed to say ridiculous all weekend whenever he was within earshot.
Saturday morning we watched some cartoons. This one will give you nightmares, I promise.

 

Then it was off to Pete Chiarella and Toby Klein's hardcore wrestling hour. There was a match that they put patio blocks on top of the mat and also brought in some light tubes. It looked painful.

We also got to see an uncut print of My Bloody Valentine and then the cast came out and answered questions. I got to ask the director my one question from Pinball Summer. I wanted to know if he was being meta during the final scene where they are having a pinball tournament and they were playing a machine that had the cast painted on it. He kind of joked about it, but just said they did it for the true fans of the movie who would have noticed something like that. Probably not my favorite answer, but he was having a good time.

We went to The Olympia for food and ice cream. I had the chicken paprikash again as they were out of the Cuban sandwiches. I had pumpkin pie ice cream which was super delicious.
Then it was back to the convention where A Ghastlee Ghoul's Night at the Movies gave us music and games. I lost the trivia to Pete, but he gave me the trophy anyway. I discovered that while I am super good at answering trivia questions I suck at writing them.
I went back to the room for a nap with the intentions of getting up to watch Pinball Summer.
My alarm did not go off. It's okay, I have a copy of my own.
So, the next day we got up and said goodbye to our friends and came back home. It always goes by way to fast for me.
It was a great time.




Monday, April 9, 2018

CINEMA WASTELAND REPORT APRIL 2018

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The lovely Martha Waltz along with two of our offspring, Daniel and Dandelion, headed down to Ohio for our twice a year journey to the best of all conventions...CINEMA WASTELAND! The journey was uneventful which is always nice. I made many breakfast sandwiches to fortify our trip and we took enough snacks to feed a third world country for a month.  There was only one cancellation Belinda Balinski (sp) had the flu. They had a card out to send to her so I signed that. Two epic panels were the Dee Wallace panel which I did capture on video and will post on the YouTube soon. Later we talked to her and I mentioned that she was in the comic book The Howling:Revenge of the Werewolf Queen and I made her laugh. We went to Ground Zero to see if they had a copy, but they didn't. Funny thing is the owner didn't even know about it so he ordered a copy for himself.
Then the gentlemen of Horror High did a magnificent panel they are Pat Cardi, Terry Carter and Austin Stoker. Also on video headed up as fast as my crappy wifi will allow. I think I'll post links here as they get put up.
The Hardcore Wrestling Hour brought the bittersweet news of Toby Klein's retirement from the business, but the matches were gruesome as Hell. All we have come to expect from the one and only Pete Chiarella.
Caught some classic B&W Disney in the morning on Saturday.
Chatted with Tom Sullivan and gave him a copy of Divine Exploitation. He gave me a cool Necronomicon notebook and Martha Immediately snatched that up.
Saw many friends; Mike Watt, Amy Lynn Best, Bill Zebub (More on him later) Matthew Skelley, Gary Kent (More on him in a minute), the guy who sells t shirts that I never remember his name, Henrique Couto, Troma Dan, Gonzo, Pete Chiarella, The Splattertude gang, Gunga Jim, Ken Kish and people who I have probably forgotten. 
Love and Other Stunts is a documentary about Gary Kent the world's nicest stuntman. It is an epic film and I encourage everyone to go see it. Having Gary there with it made it super special and I did get a copy of that along with the soundtrack where Gary sings on two of the songs.
The epic news that J.R. Bookwalter is releasing Robot Ninja on BluRay made me super happy.
I did get a copy of Sadist of Notre Dame from Severin and it is such a great print with some super extras on it. Now if we could get Robert Monell and Stephen Thrower to agree on where the interiors of the cathedral were shot then we would be in business. 
We went to our favorite restaurant The Olympia for food and I tried the Belgian Waffle ice cream. It was awesome.
I tried watching The Wild Women of Wongo with Gunga Jim, but the print was bad and I have a great print of it so it made my eyes hurt to watch.
A Ghastlee Ghoul's Night At The Movies was great. Great music. Lots of laughs and I won a couple of prizes. Also, I don't know what PJ Soles eye looks like so I botched an answer. There was a young kid there named Jared that was as smart as a whip and did great. He can be the new trivia guy. I'm retired.
Martha and I watched Chanber of Horrors with the Fear Flasher and Horror Horn gimmicks. It was excellent. I've seen it before. We laughed every time it went off because nothing gross happened any of the times it went off. I was surprised to see a Tony Curtis cameo in the film.
The the midnight showing of Exploitation by Bill Zebub. Nathan Rumler was there so he lost his pants pretty early on. It's kind of a Wasteland tradition. I already have the three and a half hour version of the film so this one went pretty quick except that I was tired. 2 AM is Waaaayyyyyy past this old farts bed time. Another winner for Bill Zebub.
On Sunday we went around and said our goodbyes. Martha bought some things from Cathy, another Wasteland tradition for the Waltz Family. She has the coolest stuff.
Then off to Kalamazoo for the final tradition of Wasteland...White Castle! I tried one of their crab cake sliders. I would get one again, but with no sauce.
Didn't care for the sauce.
Now for the long six month wait for the October show.

Sunday, April 8, 2018

LOVE AND OTHER STUNTS 2018

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Forever and a day ago a Yahoo Group decided to attend a Midwest convention called Cinema Wasteland. I went and it was literally a life changing experience for me. That many people that knew stuff that I knew. I had found my tribe and Ken Kish is my Patronus. Years later after I had developed a wonderful friendship with the only and only Pete Chiarella he mentioned that stunt man Gary Kent was coming to Wasteland. I had seen most of the movies he worked on so I was super excited that he was coming. He wrote an autobiography Shadows and Light that he sold out when he appeared at Wasteland. I had to buy one online and I devoured it. One of the best books about Hollywood and the independent film movement.
Jump ahead to this year and Cinema Wasteland 2018 and I was so happy that Gary Kent was going to be there with director Joe O'Connell. Together they had made a documentary chronicling Gary's life.
I knew I needed to watch that. I got lucky that they were selling copies of the film and the soundtrack that Gary sings on as well. They even threw in a cool t shirt and I finally got Gary to sign my copy of Shadows and Light.
If you've read the book it gives you every facet of Gary's life. The documentary managed to expound on that by showing us where Gary had been. How he came through life to be one of the most fearless stunt men in the history of film. It has great parts, sad parts and when you come through to the other end you have been exposed to the life and times of Gary Kent. Probably one of the best documentaries about a single person I have ever seen. Hats off to Director Joe O'Connell for giving us a love letter to a man that manages to touch anyone's heart that he comes in contact with. I hope for a DVD release with an abundance of extras. Maybe a commentary by these two men that have managed to create such a wonderful film.
Honestly, The movie showed at 10:45PM, we had driven four hours to get there and it was way past my bedtime and I could have watched another hour without a problem.
If the film comes to your area and you have any interest in film of any kind you must go see this movie. If not, wait for the release and treat yourself to an amazing film. 

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