THE VIDEO WORLD OF JESS FRANCO!

I have undertaken the task only a madman would think of. I decided that the recent output of Jess Franco has been given short shrift. To rectify this matter I am starting research which will culminate in a book that concerns itself only with his shot on video projects. So, From Tender Flesh to Snakewoman. I am also considering the inclusion of Killer Barbys since it's sequel is in this list. So, indepth profiles of each film and discussion of the under lying meanings behind this crop of work. Couple that with using his past films as a springboard for what he has been making lately and it should be fun. It means watching a lot of flicks though and that could be dangerous, especially where Jess is concerned. So, if you don't hear from me from time to time, that's where I am. Locked in my room watching Jess Franco films. Could be worse, trust me.

Now, on to this installment of Divine Exploitation!

Last year, for my birthday my oldest son, Seann took me to best buy to get me some DVD's. He got me a four pack called BLOOD BATH 2 because it had a copy of BLOOD SONG with Frankie Avalon. truly an underrated entry in the slasher flick genre. Anyway, next to it was a DVD set entitled HORRORLICIOUS. Nine flicks for about 6 bucks! How could I go wrong?

Here's what the six bucks got me;

GOTHIC - That's right. Ken Russell's twisted epic that supposedly chronicles the reasons behind Mary Wollstonecraft Shelly's reason behind writing Frankenstein. Personally, I'd rather watch LAIR OF THE WHITE WORM again, but it has some wild surreal touches.

THE DEVIL'S NIGHTMARE - I swear that when I was growing up that the owner of The Portage Drive In owned a print of this flick. He showed it every year with a different title! The beginning shot in sepia tone of the Nazi stabbing his baby daughter in her crib sets the mood for this flick of a demon who wipes out travellers to a castle and she does it according to the seven deadly sins. The guy playing Satan still creeps me out to this day.

THE HOUSE ON THE EDGE OF THE PARK - We get David Hess at his Hessiness. Watch David torment a group of partygoers. Watch David chew the scenery with the best of him. I do admit that the twist ending got me good the first time, but after that it just doesn't work.

BLOODY PIT OF HORROR - Ahh! Mickey Hartigay as The Crimson Executioner. I swear that this flick is the template for all those recent forays into torture horror like HOSTEL that have been coming out lately. Except this one is good. Mickey could give David Hess scenery chewing lessons.

HORRORS OF SPIDER ISLAND - Creepy spider monsters, creepy spider guy, lots of hot, curvy models all shot in some creepy ass black and white. I don't think it would have been quite as bizarre in color.

SISTERS OF DEATH - Five sorority sisters come back together to share a dangerous secret. And someone is killing them for it. This one works pretty good and it's twist is one of those where you keep saying, "Naw! That can't be what is going on." And then it is. Worked a lot like an old ABC Movie OF The Week and a lot of those were pretty good.

TERROR CREATURES FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE - Ah, Barbara Steele! Barbara Steele in black and white which is far better. That woman was meant to be viewed in monochromatic. And the tale set in an old hoary castle is quite interesting to boot.

THE NIGHT SHE AROSE FROM THE TOMB - Probably better known as THE NIGHT EVELYN CAME OUT OF THE GRAVE, this bizarre tale tells of a man who is slowly being driven to madness by his dead wife. Or is he? And the interesting thing to me on this one is that he is whacking women in the beginning of the film, but by the end he comes out as the hero of the flick. Truly a WTF? moment in Eurotrash cinema.

THE VAMPIRE'S NIECE - Known as FANGS OF THE LIVING DEAD this vampire flick stars Anita Ekberg and her two magnificent assets. When Anita inherits a castle she finds more than she bargained for in this atmospheric flick that had played in more theaters under more different names so you were always guaranteed to see it more than once.

There ya go kiddies. Nine really good flicks in pretty good shape I might add. Maybe not pristine prints, but watchable and in the end that's what really matters.

ON THE NIGHT HIGHWAYS ....Submission CALL!!!

Time to pitch the zine I'm doing again that will see print in late April. It's called ON THE NIGHT HIGHWAYS. I'm looking for horror fiction from any genre. the weirder the better.Here are the rules:
No hardcore pornography of any kind, unless it's integral to the storyline, but that would be rare at best.
No poetry.
5000 words or less, but this rule can be bent for that certain story.
Payment is as follows;
Writers - $1 regardless of length and five copies of the zine.
Artists - Yes I need art, too. $5.00 plus five copies of the zine.
It's not a lot, but it is a paying market.
Additional copies of the zines can be purchased for a dollar each either by check, money order or cash to;
Douglas Waltz1915 Douglas Ave.Kalamazoo MI 49007
or via PayPal at:
dwaltzwriter@yahoo.com
Please send all submission in the form of an attachment. All art as a jpeg. No snail mail submissions!
Have fun!

DR. DRECK PRESENTS; DOCTOR OF DOOM

Over in the vast wilderness of Massachusetts resides a madman. A man dedicated to making sure that we see movies in their original format and some movies that we might never watch. One such film, DOCTOR OF DOOM directed by the legendary Rene Cardona Sr. under the original title of Las Luchadoras vs. El Medico Asesino tells of a madman who is working on the ultimate brain transplant. Unfortunately, all of his subject tend to die. At first he thinks it's because they are not smart enough so, he makes off with a lab assistant. Bad move for the doctor because her sister is a wrestler. He then deduces that with a strong enough woman the transplant will work. That's where the lady wrestlers come in...with a vengeance. Hot for revenge our femme fatale agrees to help the local police bag the mad doctor. What they don't know is that he has this giant gorilla thingie under his command and when it's wearing it's special suit it is impervious to gunfire. An unstoppable monster of pure rage under the command of a madman with a deadly agenda.
Now, Dr. Dreck has his own problems during the breaks. It seems that his giant rat, Stu has decided to become a wrestler. First he topples the mighty Godzilla toy that stands a good two inches, but later he must match wits with another rodent. Who will win the mighty rat battle?
If you're looking for a classic horror host with the most you must check out Dr. Dreck. He broadcasts on cable access in the Mendon area and surrounding counties. You can also check him out here;
www.myspace.com/drdreck
Annoying him to send you copies of the broadcasts for a nominal fee might not be a bad idea other.
The Doctor is in and his name is Dreck!

Finally Finished!!

Between reading a ton of other books and wtching waaay too many movies, I managed to finsh this weighty tome. I think the size of this monster and the fact that it weighs in at just under five pounds, makes this a hard to tote along book. This was my read before bed book for a few weeks now. And I have finally finished the thing!
Final impressions are that it is a beautiful book and by using direct quotes by the hundreds of people involved in the series it gave us an in depth look into the whole movie making process. I really thought it was funny how some of these people are still bickering over who took credit for what and some of the attitudes of the actors are so shallow! It's like they feel it's necessary to belittle the projects that gave them such memorable screen time. Did they think that people were going to remeber them for that Shakespeare in the park they did waaay back when? No, they're gonna remember when Jason whacked you with (insert weapon of choice here). You'd think they would be more grateful.
In the end, the true measure of anything is, when it's over did you want more? Absolutely! I could have read this book if it were twice this size.
Great book and well worth the price.

THE POWER OF MUSK!!!

Do you see those rows and rows of pretty pink confections above this? They are called Musk Flavored Life Savers and they are from Australia. I first learned of these many moons ago when I was reading Paul Lukas' zine Beer Frame. Paul now has a website for all things bizarreat;
http://www.core77.com/inconspicuous/
It's pretty cool and you should go there.
Anyway, back to the Life Savers.
So, I'm reading about these Musk Flavored LIfe Savers in Beer Frame and I become obsessed with trying them. I started trolling the internet for an Australian buddy and soon came across one. I sent her cash and she sent me the Life Savers. Musk Life Savers are Pepto Bismol pink and smell like Musk perfume. They have a sweet suntle taste that's hard to put your finger on because it assails your sense of smell as it attacks our sense of taste. Needless to say this is an acquired taste and my wife and I soon became addicted to the sweets. Unfortuantely, I lost contact with my Musk supplier and we hadn't had any of them for many, many moons.
Then I found an online store called About Australia. You can find them here;
http://about-australia-shop.com/product_info.php/products_id/581
Even with shipping and handling they come to less than a buck a roll which is a pretty good deal. Of course if you're curious that's quite an outlay of cash. For a little over twenty bucks you get 24 rolls of Musk and they at least make for a curious little thing to hand out to friends and family. The looks on their faces when they put one in their mouth for the first time is priceless.
Now I need to find the other Australian flavor THIRST!
God only knows what they must taste like.

SHAMELESS PLUG

I have belonged to a Yahoo! group called The Parasitorium for a little while now and they have released their second anthology with a story entitled, ATTACK OF THE CREATURES FROM BEYOND in it. If you like old B Movies with plot holes so big you can drive a truck through them then this is the story for you, plus you get 18 more stories as well. Here's the link available for sale and download;

http://www.lulu.com/content/643131

Go and get your copy today!

THE GHASTLY ONE: THE SEX-GORE NETHERWORLD OF FILMMAKER ANDY MILLIGAN

I first heard of Andy Milligan in the early eighties. It was from a small press magazine called Demonique or some such thing. It was there that I also learned of a film entitled LEMORA, but more of that another time. The films of Andy sounded too bizarre and back then there was no way I was going to get to see any of them. I looked with my limited access in the wilds of Kalamazoo Michigan, to no avail. As the years went on I read a few more things concerning Mr. Milligan, but it wouldn't be until the new millineum when I would first be exposed to his work. I ordered a VHS of THE RATS ARE COMING, THE WEREWOLVES ARE HERE! and from that point on I was hooked. This low budget spectacle was grindhouse extrodinaire. I couldn't get enough of it. Later I would pick up the Something Weird Milligan double feature of THE GHASTLY ONES and SEEDS OF SIN. I have watched every second of that disc repeatedly. In the disc was a little essay and it mentioned the book that I present for your entertainment today. I found a copy at www.oldies.com for a measly three bucks and decided to order it immediately.
Now, I like a good biography. Two of my favorites are; EDIE by Jean Stein and George Plimpton and NIGHTMARE OF ECSTACY:THE LIFE AND ART OF EDWARD D. WOOD JR. by Rudolph Grey. This book blows them both out of the water. While I like the style of the other two books and the way they use personal recollections of many people to form a cohesive history of their subject, neither of them get as dirty as author Jimmy McDonough does with THE GHASTLY ONE. The book is a time capsule of the off off broadway scene juxtaposed with the ins and outs of exploitation film making and distribution on 42nd Street. The fact that Mr. McDonough uses many quotes from MIlligan and is actually with him at the time of his death, paints a much more intimate portrait of a madman than any other book is able to do. The Andy Warhol book, HOLY TERROR comes close but it's author, Bob Colacello seems more concerned with himself than his subject. HOLY TERROR comes off as way too whiny for me. In THE GHASTLY ONE we are given our subject with no flourishes or retouches. Andy Milligan is laid bare before us and we realize that in spite of his forced medium (you really can't say chosen it just doesn't play out that way) he manages to make films that are still discussed today. Love him or loathe him, there is no middle ground with Andy Milligan.
www.amazon.com has thirteen copies of this priced at less than 10 bucks plus shipping. www.oldies.com is still selling copies for three bucks. There is no reason in the world that anyone who is serious about film in any form should not own this book. It will be the best and most disturbing thing you will ever read and you'll be glad you did it.

Here's the link to amazon for the book;
http://www.amazon.com/Ghastly-One-Sex-Gore-Netherworld-Filmmaker/dp/1556524951/sr=1-1/qid=1169672486/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/102-2139019-1309715?ie=UTF8&s=books

Here's the link for Oldies.com;
http://www.oldies.com/product-view/BK1385.html

What are you waiting for? Go and get this book! You can thank me later.

Seeya!