Goodbye...

It's not like you're really gone because you left us so many movies to enjoy, but the world is a little grayer with your passing.

THE PROSPECTOR'S CURSE (2012)

A new short flick in the horror comedy genre is about to hit and I thought I would give my faithful readers a taste.

Here's the poster:

Review to follow in the near future.

FATHER'S DAY (2011)

FATHER’S DAY
Directed by Astron-6
DVD release by TROMA

I had heard of Father’s Day in passing, not a lot of details, but I knew that Troma was behind the release so, I was sold. They asked if anyone wanted to review the film so, I threw my hat in the ring.
A few days later a package arrived. The front was emblazoned with the Troma seal of approval and the back had an epic poster for the film.
I still had no idea what it was about.
The DVD I popped in the player gave me no warning to the bizarreness that was waiting for me. It seems there is this guy named Chris Fuchman (Mackenzie Murdock)who likes to kill and rape dads. The scenes of cannibalism are extremely gruesome. The church sends young Father John Sullivan (Matthew Kennedy) to find Ahab (Adam Brooks), he fought the beast before and it has returned. Ahab’s sister, Chelsea (Amy Groening) is also on the trail of the beast. When she’s not working as a stripper. Throw in a gay, prostitute named Twink (Conor Sweeney) and they all have a vendetta against this monster.
FATHER’S DAY doesn’t take itself too seriously, but it comes across as a pitch perfect grindhouse flick. Between the ultra gore and enough male and female nudity to fill a porn flick, FATHER”S DAY doesn’t pull a lot of punches. There is a scene with a needle, a razor and a penis that will make you squirm if you can bear to watch it all.
I really like the way that the film exists on the late show complete with commercials and other cool stuff. I’m interested to see how far they take this on the official DVD release.
Astron-6 is a collective of people and they have proved that this might be the best ten grand that Troma has ever invested.

BOOK OF LORE/GRAVE MISTAKES

I had the privilege of meeting director Chris LaMartina last year at Cinema Wasteland. I bought this twofer from him and his feature AmeriKill from Warlock Video. AmeriKill was good, especially from a 14 year old kid who shot on VHS and made like three cuts to create what AmeriKill was.
Book Of Lore proves what a talent he really is.
I watched everything on the disc before watching the feature. Well, except for the making of, didn't want to ruin the flick. The film Grave Mistakes, the bonus movie, is an awesome throwback to anthology movies of yore. With vampires, ghosts and other things that go bump in the night with an ingenious wraparound of a grave robber and an antique dealer bartering for the grave robber's ill gotten goods, Grave Mistakes belongs with such classic anthology films as Creepshow and any of the Amicus anthologies.
But, Book Of Lore takes the cake. It literally takes the cake, eats the cake and then grins at you with frosting in its teeth and makes fun of you.
Book of Lore is what all micro budget films must aspire to.
The plot deals with the small town of Latonsville and twenty years ago where for eleven nights, eleven babies were taken from their cribs. It was blamed on a madman called The Devil's Left Hand and as mysteriously as it began, it stopped.
Now, Ricks Adams' (AJ Hyde) girlfriend, Rachel Matthews (Lindsay Hanson) has been brutally murdered.  His Buddy Jason (Dan Vidor) has a book called The Book Of Lore. The Book of Lore, scrawled in a dirty, old composition book tells of all the myths and legends that have occurred in Latonsville through the decades. It is in the book that Rick sees the death of his girlfriend predicted and more are on the way.
With the help of his friends he must solve the riddle of The Book of Lore, but what he finds along the way rips the lid off the legends of Latonsville and reveals the work of a madman.
Book of Lore is such a layered creepfest that it sucks you in and doesn't let go. You feel as if you have known these people their entire lives and must know what happens. Director LaMartina creates such suspense through the entire film that you find yourself on the edge of your seat. It reminded me of a Stephen King story in it's complexity and is one of the most original films I have seen in a while and is more deserving of an actual theatrical release than many films that get one.
The DVD double feature is worth every penny. You get two, well crafted films that hearken back to the day when it was about story not effects, although those are pretty gruesome, too.
THE BOOK OF LORE. GET IT!   

CAESAR AND OTTO'S SUMMER CAMP MASSACRE (2009)

I had the privilege of meeting Felissa Rose a while back and she was great. Very warm and friendly. I mentioned that I was a film reviewer and she autographed and handed me a copy of this film. I had some much needed down time today so I decided to give it my full attention.
Kind of wish I had watched it sooner.
The basic plot is there are these two brothers Caesar (Dave Campfield) and Otto (Paul Chomicki) and Caesar is the one that loves to act and does all the work while Otto watches a lot of television. One day, a pregnant girl gets in Caesar's cab and, to make  along story short, Caesar and Otto have to go on the run necause Caesar pummeled the retarded brother of the chief of police. Believe me, when you watch it it will make perfect sense.
They go to find jobs in an out of the way place and the job counselor (Joe Estevez) gets them jobs as camp counselors.
Seems like a way to make a couple of bucks, get some fresh air and lay low for a while. Then Carrie (Felissa Rose) shows up and the killings start. And to compound matters, their father, Fred (Scott Aguilar) shows up with crime on his mind. Oh, and did I mention that there is a mental institution next to the camp? Yeah, it's a hoot.
Now the boys just have to make it out alive and still keep away from the chief of police who wants to hurt Caesar in the worst way.
I have to tell you, this is one of the funniest things I've seen this year so far. Dave Campfield's vocal delivery as Caesar just makes things funnier. There is a nice balance of gore and funny and it doesn't bog down in the middle like a lot of horror comedies are wont to do.
Dave Campfield is a very funny guy and I look forward to all of his flicks.

The DVD is loaded with extras including a short film where they have to pit their wits with Dracula's lawyer. My favorite thing on this DVD would have to be a little something called 25 minutes with Joe Estevez. He just talks and answers questions and is cool and sweet and really a great guy. I think I might be going on a JOe Estevez bender in the near future so be ready for that dear readers.
So, in the end, CAESAR AND OTTO'S SUMMER CAMP MASSACRE is one of the funniest things I have seen in a while. Felissa Rose is great as always and her husband from the band CKY is also in it and very funny. This was a blast.
Thanks Felissa!

MARTY JENKINS AND THE VAMPIRE BITCHES (2006)

Marty Jenkins (Shawn A. Green) has it all; a beautiful girlfriend, Sandy (Lisa Clarke), a great job at a video store and he lives in Dayton, Ohio.
One problem.
His girlfriend is dumping him, the other guy at the video store hates Marty's guts and Dayton, Ohio is about to get inundated with vampire bitches. No, really! Look at the title of the movie for crying out loud!
When Ginger (Plexi Starr) takes his best friend, Tyler McDonald (Henrique Couto) away from him and the others turn Sandy, Marty has no recourse. Especially since he runs over the vampire killer, Deacon Sloane (Nic Pesante), who was on his way to take care of the bloodsucker problem.
Now, armed with a black bag of weapons and some words of wisdom from vampire killer, Hummer (Bob Hinton), MArty must face off against these vampire bitches to avenge his friend, save the girl and try not to get any blood on his treasured sweater vest.
On the surface, MARTY JENKINS AND THE VAMPIRE BITCHES, is a horror comedy. Pure and simple. Director Henrique Couto brings his wacky form of humor to the film and it works.
But this movie is so much more than that. We are with Marty from his painful birth, through his break up with Sandy and the loss of his buddy, Tyler. To Marty, this is his own, tiny world. This is emphasized by the size of the video store he works in. It may be a vast warehouse of movies, but Couto makes it appear diminutive in size, creating an insular existence for Marty. The vampire bitches could have been any form of destructive change and it would have worked as the catalyst to force Marty to go through a change.
Tyler sees the vampire bitches as a way out of his miserable existence even though he's not ready for the vampiric change that occurs he seems to revel in his new found powers.
I want to mention Plexi Starr again in her role as Ginger. While she is probably not everyone's cup of tea I found her infinitely more attractive than the two blonde bimbos she was saddled with as her cohorts. Added to the fact that she was the only one willing to give us our boobie fix in the flick, I would have to say that she was my favorite part of the movie. That and the crazy, mumbling antics of Bob Hinton. He comes across as if Ernest P. Worrell had a drug addled brother. Excellent!

Now, for a Spoiler Alert. I'll place the trailer for the film here for you to watch and then the spoiler.










SPOILER ALERT! (You have been warned!Stew, this means you. Don't read any farther until after you watch it.)
At the end of the film Marty realizes that Sandy is a bitch and has no chance for redemption. He decides to save Ellen (River Watson) instead. In any traditional film this would have been Marty's in for some sweet loving. In Couto's universe, Ellen is grateful, but she's gonna bang the other guy at the video store instead. It ends the film on such a poignant, tragic note. Marty has saved Dayton and there is nothing for him at the end. No tangible reward.
This is how micro budget cinema needs to be and I'm glad to recommend this to anyone. Go find your copy today.
You'll be glad you did.

IRON SKY (2012)

Just saw the trailer for this one and, what can I say?
It blew me away. This is going to be the exploitation movie of the year.

Check out the trailer;